Weird Fishes

This morning I was woken up at 7am with a phone call from my 20 year old hot dish. I've been acting like a crazy 18 year old phone stalker with him ever since I left - sending him text messages, emailing him, calling him. Like I mentioned before, I deleted his phone number from my phone so this call was a surprise. So anyway, for the first time we actually talked on the phone. It turns out that he drank too much Patrone and took too much Aderol hence he's awake 4am his time, 7am my time. Speaking to him is like speaking to well, an immature 20 year old kid. It was painful. He was sitting in his apartment in Arizona while his friend Leah (yes, I already tried to look her up on Facebook) was passed out in the living room. Like a crazy woman, I offered to buy him a plane ticket out to NYC (he's never been) but he declined the offer because he has, "too much work to do." I realized besides great sex, we don't have much in common. I will try to curb my fantasies about him today.

Last night on my way to my buddy's house, I passed a Frenchman and his two year old kid (who had a scarf tied around his neck - how oh so French). The dad was checking me out. All I could think of is how if I was was either dating or married to him, him and his son would go back and forth at what an idiot I am in French while I sat there at the table without a clue what the fuck they were saying.

The faux pas of the day with men is - BAD SHOES. If a guy is wearing bad shoes it is a deal breaker for me. To be safe wear gray New Balances.